Building Your Child’s Self Esteem
There is a certain truth to a child learning through osmosis. Not necessarily in the photosynthesis application like plants do, but more in the vein of ‘monkey see, monkey do’. In other words, when they are small they mimic what they see; and the ones they see the most are their parents.
To the point; the way in which they observe you has great impact on how they perceive themselves. If you are a positive role model, it is most likely they will see themselves in a positive light. Conversely, being a poor role model will impact their self esteem in a negative way. Therefore, it is imperative that you accentuate a positive lifestyle in order for your children to have the best chance of developing a positive self esteem.
One way of accomplishing this goal is to ensure they are given age appropriate tasks to perform that they are able to complete. When this is accomplished, give them positive reinforcement by praising them for completing the job. This will go a long way towards helping your child develop a positive self image. As they grow and are able to handle more difficult tasks, they will have a better chance of success in completing those assignments because they will more likely believe in themselves and that they are able to finish the task with positive results.
Should the occasion arise that your child becomes moody or they manifest feelings of sadness, depression or anger, be sure to make yourself available to talk about it. When you do this, keep in mind to remain non-threatening and minimize the urge to judge or criticize the way in which they are dealing with the situation. You as the adult need to realize they may not fully understand why they feel the way they do and to force them into a corner with your opinion may make matters worse.
Offer options within a positive environment, while at the same time encouraging them to work through the situation on their own with your guiding hand. Many times you can accomplish this by allowing them to answer their own questions simply by offering thoughtful ideas that will help them through the maze. By applying this approach successfully, they will feel free to come to you again and again with their problems, knowing you will be a positive source in helping them make the hard decisions without feeling they are going to be in a judgmental atmosphere.
You will want to let them know you truly care and, by offering the need to set goals and make a plan that needs to be followed through to completion, you will be establishing a positive self image. Again, keep in mind age appropriate tasks that ensure the best potential for success. As they work through the task, offer positive encouragement along the way. When the task is completed, give them positive reinforcement through praise on a job well done.
One final thought: never be afraid to let your child know you’re not perfect. They will appreciate this transparency and will better understand it is okay to fail at times. Within this, make sure you separate any bad behavior or wrong decisions done by the child from who the child is. By so doing, your child will learn the difference between what they did and who they are in your eyes. Then, as they grow and mature into adults themselves, they will have a positive self image of who they are and will be better equipped to handle both success and failure within the framework of life itself. They will accept those failures as life experiences that can be used to establish a foundation on which to build success with a healthy self esteem.
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Thank you so much, there aren’t enough posts on this… or at least i cant find them. I am turning into such a blog nut, I just cant get enough and this is such an important topic… i’ll be sure to write something about your site
Thank you so much, there aren’t enough posts on this… keep up the good work
Thank you so much, Great information… You keep writing and I’ll keep reading.